10 Weekend Update Jokes That Might Get Colin Jost and Michael Che Fired
Forget those rumors about Colin Jost and Michael Che leaving Saturday Night Live at season’s end. If they keep it up with these censor-shattering punchlines, they might not make it to next week’s season finale.
Here are 10 Weekend Update jokes that come so close to crossing the line that somebody might be looking for a new job…
JOST: The Vatican has selected Cardinal Robert Francis Prevost, who is from the South Side of Chicago, to be the new Pope. You can tell he’s from the South Side because he’s got his hands up.
CHE: President Trump says he will appoint Fox News host Jeanine Pirro as interim U.S. attorney for Washington, D.C. Pirro celebrated the news with a bottle of wine every day for the last 50 years.
JOST: When I heard the Pope was a super-religious guy from Chicago in a funny robe, I was worried it was Kanye.
CHE: President Trump announced plans for a 100-percent tariff on movies made outside the U.S., which is no problem for me because all the movies I watch were filmed in a Florida condo on a leather couch.
JOST: Insiders say Trump is trying to create tension between his potential successors, Marco Rubio and J.D. Vance. Mostly by pointing at them and saying, “Kiss.”
CHE: President Trump says he was interested in reopening Alcatraz because it represents something “horrible and beautiful and strong and miserable and weak.” Which are also his nicknames for his five children.
JOST: The White House marked Star Wars Day by posting an A.I.-generated picture of President Trump as a muscle-bound Jedi. And they also posted a picture of J.D. the Hutt.
CHE: Insiders at the FBI are concerned that director Kash Patel is not at work enough and is often seen attending sporting events with celebrities. But like his eyes, Patel can be in two places at once.
JOST: The first week of jury selection in the Sean Combs trial has ended without a jury being selected. Well, yeah, where are you going to find 12 people who haven’t had sex with Diddy?
CHE: President Trump says Catholics loved an image he posted of him dressed as the Pope last week. But I just find it hard to believe that anyone in the Catholic Church would be into something so juvenile.
